The only two results of people pleasing.

“You cannot exist for anyone else, so will you choose a path of slow emotional and mental suicide, or will you come out of the shadows and assert your right to shine your own unique color of light onto the world?” ~Liz Seda

I am not really an asshole. I am just really, really honest. People despise me for it. I can’t help it though. If you ask me a question I am going to answer it honestly. Does the fact that you may not like the answer mean I should lie so that you will feel better about yourself or so that you might like me? No!

I am so content and at complete peace because my integrity. Yeah there are people who don’t like me for it but there are also people who love me for it and their love is enough.

I have learned that I get a good response from blog posts that are about me but this one is definitely not one of those. Although, this topic has affected me several times over that past 20 years or so. Anyway, I have recently realized that there are only two results of actions done to make others happy and thought I should share that here. Funny thing is the results are very similar to the results of doing something out of fear and not love.

1) If you do something for the sake of pleasing someone else, you won’t do it long.

Here is the thing, even if the thing has outstanding results, it still won’t last. I once made a girlfriend quit smoking. I even paid for her auricular therapy. Obviously she benefited from quitting but it was not her choice. She did it for me not for her and, as a result, she started back up as soon as I left the country for work.

2) If you do happen to continue to it, you will resent the person you are trying to make happy.

So if we continue with the above example; the whole time she was not smoking she hated me for it. Obviously when you resent the person you are in a relationship with, you are not going to be very happy and we weren’t. Why do you think I took a job out of the country.

What about volunteering or giving to charity, etc?

I know people feel neither of the two things mentioned above when they are working at a food kitchen or an animal shelter but they are not doing these things to make these people or dogs happy. They are doing it to help them which in turn, makes themselves happy. Which essentially means they are doing it for themselves not for others. You see the difference?

While doing research for this post I came across this┬ápost. In it blogger, Liz Seda, covers everything I could have wished to talk about on this subject. It’s a must read and because of it, I am cutting this post super short, which is good because I like to make my post quick and to the point.

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